recurring dream of olivier

i often dream of one person.. he's always on the edges of my subconscious.. always in dark colors, always saving someone, saving me.. for the past few nights when i've managed to get a few hours of sleep, he visits me.. always holding my hand or extending his hand to me, always telling me it will all be okay, not to worry.. although i did have one dream where i was in his house, which i've actually never been, and he was pulling me forward to meet his friend who had come in, the feel of warmth and safety was there..

as the owner of an analytical mind, i decided to find out what the purpose, if any, a recurring dream has, if it means something and why it relates to me.. so, i called my mom, my cousin and a friend who all have an interest in dream symbology and dreams in general.. the consensus of the three women is that it all relates to some unfinished business with this person or some underlying fear or conflict as well as a possible conflict or unresolved issue i have in my awake life..

as i ponder this information, i start to put two-n-two together and realize he usually comes to me in my dreams when i'm worried, alone, scared, nervous and for a brief moment in my life, i allow someone to take my hand and reassure me that all will be well.. i am safe while i dream and i am cushioned in this warm, comforting nest he offers..

i don't take the dreams i have of him in a literal sense because in the real world, i told him i did not wish to think of him because he is like a ghost to me.. i hang onto the hope that i will one day see him and told him that i know it will most likely never occur.. i wished him well and hoped that he will stay safe.. i miss him.. i probably always will..

however, if for a moment in my life, despite it being in my sleeping life, i feel safe when i see him, i will take that..